The Other Side - A Place of Dirt and Weeds

My favorite saying is, "The grass is greener where you water it."  The thing about watering grass is it has to be done regularly, dare I say often.  You can be the other side offering inspiration.  Sure, there will be those who are simply envious because they haven't figured out how to water their grass, but I choose to focus on the positive impact I can have by taking care of my stuff.

Watering my yard is using my capsule wardrobe to look good because I value myself and expect others to value me as well; Building authentic, reciprocal  relationships that can grow by hosting people in my house that is inviting; Staying focused on the importance of family and having time for meaningful conversations where I give my undivided attention; Giving grace whether it's deserved or not because I need it too.  These are all things in my control.   For me, "The Other Side" are those things not in my control.   For those things, I still have a sphere of influence.

I'm pro-life and the best thing I can do as a mom of older teenagers is to let them know I welcome grandchildren, now and forever.  I am against violence, and prefer not to be a victim so I take measures to protect myself. Yes, that means I am all for the second amendment and citizens arming themselves.  I take the opportunity seriously by attending training and practicing regularly.  I work on helping my kids communicate their needs and share their thoughts so they know they are valued. I am an Ally to the LGBTQ community.  There will be haters and I can't control that but, I will defend the right to love whomever one loves until my dying breath.

There are also two sides to mental health: wellness and illness.  Believe it or not, the two can co-exist. I am taking all the steps towards wellness: Therapy - check, Meds - check, Exercise - check, Food - check, Self care - check, Support network utilized - check.  Yet still, the illness flares.  Such is the case for me at this time.   Tending to my crabgrass filled yard is a tedious, back breaking feat but it must be done for I refuse to go to a place of dirt and weeds.

Hey Wonderwoman!

I felt as if I had found my groove over the past couple of months.  I was faithfully walking my dogs in the early am.  I would come home and do a few chores and work on a minimalist project.  My step count was increasing weekly (love my FitBit) and I was losing weight, per doctors' orders, slowing but surely.  Now I have order to rest for 10 days.  It turns out all my productive steps were doing serious damage to my feet.  I am on a 21 day round of steroids with lots of tlc protocols to follow for healing.

The hardest part of this forced slow down is the amount of help I must ask for from my family.  Thankfully they are understanding and supportive.  So I must ask myself, why am I so uncomfortable with asking for help when it is so willingly given in response each time?  Honestly? It's because I have yet to minimize the amount of things for which I feel responsible.  My gut says it my job, I'm taking advantage of my loved ones by asking for help, stop being lazy.

A minimalist house does not stay clean simply because it has minimal stuff in it.  It still takes effort, far less than before I started this journey, but effort still.  In this reflective moment I must say how much I love my family.  They have embraced my "personal" minimalist movement and made the journey so enjoyable with their praise of my progress and honoring my efforts.  They do not see it as "my job" or "taking advantage" of them and let me know I am far from "being lazy."

Why I would listen to my gut, which clearly has issues because it is a Celiac, could be viewed as slightly off.  I need to be listening to my loved ones.  I need to find that inner voice of Grace that I know exists.  Let's tune into Grace and see what she has to say:

Hey Wonderwoman!  It's me, Grace.  You've been doing a great job setting and meeting your goals lately and I'm so proud of all your progress.  I've noticed you being hard on yourself lately and I'd like to assure you, you are still Wonderwoman.  Taking care of yourself is the hardest thing for you to do, next to letting others take care of you.  Your goals are different, but none less important.  You will get back to walking in time.  There's no rush right now.  You are not weak.  You are not a failure.  You're freaking Wonderwoman!  Got it?  Now sit back and enjoy the show of the life you have created: a loving, supportive family, good friends, cozy home, & your fur-babies.

The Details Are In The Journey

I admit if I'm walking, I want to be headed to a destination.  Recently that viewpoint has changed as I'm learning to slow down and enjoy nature and the outdoors in general.

While visiting a cousin in Seattle, we walked at a pretty good pace and would be in the middle of talking when she would stop suddenly to take a picture of the smallest of details that she had noticed.  It may be a flower, the shadows playing on a surface, a cool car or motorcycle, the birds, street art of some sort, or something else.  She modeled for me the art of being mindful of the beauty in the details that surrounds us.

Since returning from Seattle, I have been taking daily walks with my dogs in the early morning.  The park where we walk is off leash so the dogs can enjoy all the scents they desire and I can practice my mindfulness.  I enjoy watching the sunrise unfold each morning; the subtle details in the sky's coloring as the sun emerges over the horizon.  It is a great way to start my day.

I've made friends during our time at the park.  Early morning walkers are a faithful breed, dedicated not only to their dogs but seem to share the same need for a bit of grounding before starting the day's dealings with the world at large.  Funny enough, as we walk and talk, it is now me that stops and points out a detail or takes a picture or comments on an animal's morning song.

In my minimalist journey I am freeing up the physical clutter which has freed up some mental clutter as well.  I no longer wish to collect things but rather memories and I wish to experience life to the fullest.  I've had a goal to entertain more and I'm meeting that goal because of my progress.  My house is more open, easier to keep up, welcoming, and I can focus on interactions with my guests.  I guess it boils down to acknowledging the positives in paying attention to the details during the journey.